Did I commit shirk..?

I am 13 years old, and a girl. I decided to come here, feeling the need for an answer because I'm greatly afraid of the fires or hell. Ever since I learned about shirk, I started to receive heinous thoughts such as, 'I worship Aphrodite along with Allah' and 'There are other gods along with Allah' but I never truly mean them. I once said out loud to myself, 'I would worship Lakshmi, the goddess of wealth, but I am a muslim, so I only worship Allah' and I once said 'I worship Aphrodite along with Allah' but I never meant it. By Allah I did not mean to think, or even say any of these things. When I had realised about what I had said, I was sent into a wave of panic, and worry. Whenever I talk to Allah in my mind, I always whisper, 'A'uthu Billahi mina shaytanir rajeem, Allah, I apologise for my terrible thoughts. I really hope i haven't committed shirk.' I started to cry and I would always imagine my mother going to heaven and seeing myself in hell and I start to cry all the time. I am too afraid to tell my mom about this because I feel like she would be angry at me. Will Allah still forgive me, or am I doomed?